For several reasons* I’ve decided to move this blog back to Wordpress.com (free hosting) from Wordpress.org (self-hosting). If that makes no sense to you, don’t worry, all you need to know is that this blog’s URL is now:

http://mocheesepls.wordpress.com/

Same blog, different address. So copy it into your bookmarks folder or write it into your diaries! This version of the blog will be up for several more months until the domain expires, but I won’t be updating it anymore. For all the latest be sure to check out the new version of this blog at the above address.

Thanks, and happy reading!

*I’m too stingy to pay for domain registration for another year when I don’t actually need my own domain. And the only reason I moved to self-hosting was so I could circumvent China’s ban on WordPress while I was living in Shanghai. Which is not a problem anymore, now that I’m happily installed back in Melbourne. Hooray!

Because I’m going to hazard a guess that most of the people crowded around that stall did not leave their places of residence that night with the intention of buying lollies by the kilogram.

But anyway. Yesterday I woke up the morning of my Chinese oral exam — which I hadn’t studied properly for but managed to fluke because the content of my speech combined three of my favourite topics: Mandarin, shopping and Shanghai — and my Japanese FINAL EXAM (no exaggeration), thinking I’d be sitting said exams in some dingy lecture theatre on the other side of the campus from my tram stop. Well, I was wrong on both counts. I did my Chinese oral exam in the course coordinator’s office, and the Japanese exam in this building ↓

Look familiar? Well, it’s the Melbourne Exhibition Building, straddling the edge of the Cartlton Gardens and Melbourne Museum, and a venue I had always associated with exhibitions of middle aged women’s quilts, not university student exams. Not only that, it’s not even on Melbourne University’s campus. I can only imagine how much of our fees went into renting this thing for 2 and a half hours. Though I have to admit, I’ve never sat such a…picturesque (?) exam before.

I had to leave the exam early in order to take this photo, so I hope you appreciate it! (Actually, I was more motivated by a bladder dangerously close to bursting, but that shouldn’t lessen your appreciation). And I did finish the exam, technically, though I cringe to think how many silly errors will drag my final mark down, which will then be subject to another abominable round of scaling. I hate mark scaling. Unless it’s in my favour, in which case I only hate it on vague principle, har har.

But I was in a pretty good mood when I got home and I got to cut into an enormous pumpkin with a carving knife while making dinner, so all around it was a pretty successful day. And no, I don’t expect anyone to understand that logic. Put it down to a brain addled by taking exams in three different languages, which henceforth will by my official excuse for any mistakes I make, from forgetting to take in the laundry to inadvertently setting my exam venues on fire.

Don’t believe it’s possible to be stalked by a cartoon minion of Chinese government propaganda? Well, let me tell you about last Wednesday, the day when I was innocently travelling in the lift up to the third floor of Melbourne University’s Ballieu library to download yaoi to study diligently, only to step out and be faced with the sight of this.

Aaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhh! (Was my first reaction). After I recovered enough to paw my iPhone out of my bag and obtain photographic evidence of my trauma, I was struck by the fact that someone had clearly gone to some lengths to obtain so much Haibao/Expo merchandise for this, this shrine.

I will light a candle for that person’s soul.*

*Or however its done. I’m really not up on religious studies, never having been subjected to any. Go public schools! Wooooh!

Ah, that’s right.

-Me just before midnight after a week spent conjugating Japanese verbs and wasting 50% of my income on chai vanilla lattes). Nom nom.

Sailing Towards Enemy Ships

One-handedly Fending off Falling Barrel While Locked in Deadly Combat

Going to the Seashore

Checking out Funky Aphrodisiac

Doin’ the Horizontal Tango

Watching (blind) Lover Engaged in Mortal Combat with Mutinous Sailor

Announces He’s Been Doing the Pirate Princess’ Fiancé

Receiving Ransom Note for Captured Pirate Princess

Discovers that the Man who has Captured the Princess is his Lover’s Older Brother, Who also Poisoned Him as a Child and was Responsible for him Becoming an Occultist Assassin

Discovers that his Lover Murdered the Former Attorney General While still Employed as Occultist Assassin

Standing by as Lover Gets it on with said Attorney General Whom He was Supposed to have Assassinated but Actually Only Stabbed a Bit

You see, life isn’t easy for poor Ayace — what with a confusing love life and all the glowering, sword-swinging, brooding, glowering, and glowering. I therefore propose that we start a special fund to buy a new facial expression for him. Even something along the lines of “impassive” would do a world of good. Donate now!

Silences in everyday Japanese conversation

That’s right, not the content of people’s conversation, but the gaps in between. This includes timing silences between interlocutors down to milliseconds. When used to draw conclusions about styles of conversation preferred by people of different backgrounds it becomes more interesting, but on an abstract level…?

*meaningful silence*

Distraction

Yep, one of our Media and Communications guest lecturers is writing a book about being distracted. I know how he feels — just don’t expect to see this treatise finished anytime soon.

Click here to watch Cyndi stare at you soulfully (and listen to the song too, I guess).

—————————————————————————♥

灰色的天     你的脸

Grey sky     Your face

爱过也哭过笑过痛过之后

After having loved, cried, laughed, hurt

只剩再见

All that remains is goodbye

我的眼泪     湿了脸
My tears     Drenching my face

失去第一次爱的人竟然是这种感觉

Losing your first love unexpectedly feels like this

总以为     爱是全部的心跳

I always thought    Love is each and every heartbeat

失去爱我们就要…

Losing love we’ll…

就要 一点点慢慢的死掉

We’ll bit by bit, slowly, slowly die

当我 失去你那一秒     心突然就变老

In the second that I lost you     My heart suddenly turned old

The day you went away

喧闹的街     没发现我的泪     被遗忘在街角

The noisy street     Hasn’t discovered my tears     Forgotten in this corner

The day you went away

我看着你走过街

I watch you walk down the street

还穿着去年夏天我送你的那双球鞋
Still wearing the sports shoes I gave you last summer

银色手炼     还耀眼
That silver bracelet   Still dazzling

你的世界似乎一点也没有因此改变

It seems your world hasn’t changed consequently at all

有一天     也许我能把自己治好

One day maybe I’ll be able to treat myself well

再一次想起来    应该要怎么笑

Thinking of it again   How should I laugh?

第一次爱的人它的坏他的好

First love    It’s faults, his goodness

却像胸口刺青     是永远的记号
But like a tattoo on the chest   It’s a permanent mark

跟着我的呼吸     直到停止心跳

Breathe with me     Until my heart ceases to beat

——————————————————————————————♥

OK, so it’s your average syrupy heartbroken love song with unexpectedly suicidal lyrics, but I like it anyway ;) It was the first song I ever sang at karaoke in Shanghai, and has became a playlist staple every time I managed to drag a friend along with me for a three hour singing marathon. Oh, the memories! *tears up*

Only after I YouTubed the video clip for this song did I discover that it’s yet another cover of an English song by a band called M2M. I live in hope that one day the Taiwanese pop song machine will actually churn out some original music.

In the meantime, enjoy my no doubt flawless and brilliant translation above, which has Absolutely No Mistakes In It. None Whatsoever. If you find any I will make you into flesh flambée with my virtual flamethrower, capiche?

(Actually, if you find any mistakes, please comment! *bows humbly*)

Now I’m off to see Iron Man 2, because there’s nothing like lots of action and aurally damaging sound effects to help you pretend that the weekend isn’t already over, and I didn’t get to sleep in AT ALL >:( Stupid world.

V: “All right, who wants Dragonball Z stickers!?”

Students: *stare*